The Sound of a Growing Church

Usually my viewpoint at Mass is from the piano– I see the pews fill in at 10:33 AM, parents lugging in their bags and snacks and toys for their kiddos, the kids leaning over the baptismal font to dip their hand in the water, a wiggly child hoping to escape… When I’m not at the piano, now with an almost one-year old, I have also become that parent. 

I usually come in the main doors late, huffing and puffing, with a heavy child who just wants to get out of my arms. Then, the biggest decision: where to sit. Ok, do I sit in the front pews so the baby can watch things up at the altar? Do I sit in the back row in case she starts crying? Do I just camp out by the fireplace because who-knows-what is going to happen? Or to be extra safe, maybe the Cry Room… fully protected from distracting others at worship.

All of this has me reflecting not just as a parent, but as a member of the whole church community: how do we approach our little ones at Mass?

Well, first, let’s get back to basics. What is the Church? It is the people. You know who that includes? The coughing older gentleman. The musician who sang a wrong note. The priest who forgot a word. The kid running up and down the aisle. The late parents sneaking to the back row. And… the crying baby. 

As a Church, if you’re expecting a perfectly peaceful Mass experience, you’re in the wrong place. And when it comes to our littlest ones, we all need a reminder about the reality that many parishes face: no crying babies at Mass = no new families, no future Church.

At a Mass at the Sistine Chapel in 2014, Pope Francis told his congregation: “Today the choir will sing, but the most beautiful choir of all is the choir of the infants who will make a noise. Some will cry because they are not comfortable or because they are hungry. If they are hungry, mothers, feed them, without thinking twice. Because they are the most important people here.”

Pope Francis recognized the beauty within the chaos. In our parish registry, we have 178 children under the age of 5. If we split that up between three Masses, that is about 60 ‘choir members’ per Mass. With that in mind, we should not come to Mass expecting perfect peace and quiet- we should expect to hear this beautiful choir! Who knows, maybe praying among distractions could be a better prayer in the end.

This raises a good question: If we’re encouraging children to stay in the pews, then what’s the purpose of our Cry Room? 

The hope is that it is used as a quieting space where families can still hear and participate in the Mass, giving children a place to calm down. It is a temporary, transitional space, for those still learning how to participate in worship. 

Beyond that general definition, there’s not much clarity about the room’s purpose. What do people use it for? What should it be used for? What should be its name if not the Cry Room? We want to hear from everyone– non-parents and parents– with your ideas. Please share your thoughts about this space by using the following LINK.

There are always going to be distractions and noises at Mass. But next time you hear that fussy toddler or that little crying baby, I encourage you to close your eyes, take a breath, and thank God for that little choir member. That sound is the sound of a living, growing Church.